... so I have to put up another posting as soon as I possibly could *blush*
OK, OK, OK, now, tell me...
How am I supposed to reply when this guy that I know, Facebook-messaged me: "Watper beb?"
If I was younger, I would've brushed off the sheer lack of finesse and replied, "Hey you, I'm good. Wanna go out for drinks later?" Because this guy is a hunk yang sangat lah delish. Don't even get me started on how he looks because this entry will end up as a porn entry if I do.
But, HELL NO! Not now baby. In fact, come to think of it, even if I was in college I wouldn't have even entertained those kinda greetings. High school, maybe.
I feel so insulted. Hoi jock, I am a freaking Notre Dame graduate in International Relations (minoring in Art History and Theology) with two semesters on the Dean's List (let's just not mention to the Probation status ok, because I can plead temporary insanity to all of that). And this guy KNOWS all that. How dare you watper-beb me????!!! How dare you?
Ye lah, I might not have a political blog or one that discuss serious global issues, but my daily read are the Financial Daily and Malaysian Reserve. I recite Kahlil Gibran out loud when I'm down and read Neruda's poems when I'm alone in bed. And no, I don't read Mangga or URTV, or become a fan club member of some budak hingusan Akademi Fantasia unlike someone's bimbo wife.
And can you believe it, the guy who actually did the watper-beb is actually MY AGE, and of course a US grad. Maybe he watched too much Beavis & Butthead and came back and befriended a bunch of Keramat Mat Rempits. Cuz he sure acts like a hybrid of those two things. Hey, I adored Beavis & Butthead okay - "I am the Great Cornholio! I need teepee for my bunghole!!!!" But come on la, at 34???? Get real. Get a life.
You may think I'm such a snotty betch for freaking out over something as petty as this. Yeah, yeah.. so what if you graduate from Harvard or Yale or universiti kat Sintok tu... But I am far from being snotty. This is not the only time that he's insulted me. Let me tell you something ok, instead of watper beb, this guy's idea of asking me out on a date is to call me up and say:
Jock: Watsup beb? Watper malam ni? Yeah, baby...
Me: Nothing much. Why?
Jock: Lepak jom? Yeah, baby...
Me: Kat mana? (I didnt say kat manerrrr ok, I said kat mana)
Jock: Jom ah, kita gi Craven. Malam ni Arsenal playing. I see you there. Yeah, baby...
Me: Err, who else is there?
Jock: Ada la kawan-kawan I lagi 5-6 orang... Yeah, baby...
First of all, aku tak tengok bola la, bangsat. The only sports I watch are tennis and basketball (because I had a big time crush on John Starks of the NY Knicks and Pat Riley - the hottest coach EVER). And he KNOWS that. Secondly, you have 5-6 other guys there, and I'm the only girl! Nak jadi mangsa gang-bang ke aku ni? Or I'll just sit there with my mouth agape while they talk football. Hello???? And third, kalau ye pun aku nak kena jadi gang-bang victim, at least have the courtesy to pick me up at my place la. Hopeless jock.
Well in the end, I left his watper-beb at that. I didn't reply. Why should I? I have this cultured, intelligent, caring, sophisticated, funny, attractive Old Boy that I'm seeing....
OK enough, ini bukan blog jiwang...
28 comments:
Hello Minah...lu tensyen apa hal? Dah tau dia tu bangsat, lu bikin macam lu tak angkat port la. Lu nak tunjuk dia bengap lu copy URL posting ni kasi dia baca.
Lu tak payah gangbang, Minah...wa lu punya one-man gangbang...betul tak? Sebab tu sekarang lu tidur nyenyak.
Calit skets beb. ;)
Kepala hotak lu SD.
Wa tidur nyenyak sebab wa tak hingin nak dengar lu punya ngok ngek ngok ngek... Bosan giler. Cakap banyak sangat.
Calit skets, beb ;P
Wa tak cakap lu bilang wa silencer. Jadi wa story la kat lu apa-apa story pun. Tak payah la lu nak layan mamat poyo tu. Wa cukup getik kalau ada mamat bangsat tak reti layan awek ke...bini ke. Suruh awek ke bini drive sendiri ajak nengok bola...atau suruh bini pakai jersey duduk nengok bola kat sebelah. Macam cipet. Wa pun bukan suka nengok bola...tapi wa sokong apa jua team selain MU dan ini termasuklah team dari Pilmoor Estate.
Lagi wa tak suka kalau awek/bini tu duduk tengok bola tercengang pikat langau tak tau hujung pangkal game tapi nengok bola dengan harapan balak kasi orgasm lepas tu guna jari kelingking...eh...marah HINDRAF.
Wei cipet, kalau nak tulis pasal ex girlfriend tulis kat blog sendiri lah.
Hek eleh! Lu perasan bethol la! Cabul bethol mulut lu. Bila plak wa tulis pasal ex-gf? Wa mana ada ex-gf...wa kan pemampan emosi aje.
I selalu je nampak the one sole female sitting looking bored time boyfriend / laki tengok bola. Gila kesian kadang-kadang.. the look on their faces are worse then I look when I am dragged pergi beli pinggan mangkuk.
Kadang2 these blokes ni ajak girls (esp yang cun) pergi so tambah street cred kat kawan-kawan. Trophy.
Sangat yelch.
Idlan, Tapi jock ni kalau bawak I.. habis la street cred. Sebab I mak orang. Hee hee... When you come back I ask Jock to give you a call lah.. hehehe since you enjoy football so much, kan? Nak tak? Then you can kutuk him all you want in your blog.
Oh my GOD. Reminds me of one of our brothers.
SAKIT JIWA when he said that beb word to me. SAKIT to the bone ok.
I posted something called What Men Want on my blog two months ago.
You can read about trophies in it. Here is the URL:
http://narcaholic.com/blog/?p=1589
za, yeah. sangat unrefined. and immature. camne nak mengaku sibling tu? (barf)
hi beb!!!!! gosh!!! if you were to hear my friends and i talk.... u would probably reject me as a friend!!!!
beb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ish tamau! Eh wait. Cute tak? Maybe dia boleh jadi arm-candy I tengok bola kat mamak pulakk.. hahaha.
aiz, dengan friends takpe okay.. You know la kita sembang pun macam mana kan.. Heehee.. bukan la Queen's English. But when it comes to suitors ni.. alahai...
idlan, cute tau mamat ni.. biceps bagai... hee hee.. sangat arm candy. will up your street cred!!!!
i know.
hrmmm jazz...despite that u dun like that 'watper beb' guy, he certainly got an entry in ur blog...so if he's intentions were to get ur attention, i'd say he succeeded didn't he? hehehe
Wo! apa ni sembang gaduh dua olang ni! hahaahaa
Wa ingat kan mamat 'watper beb' tu kan tengah mabuk chivas larrr wa cakap lu. Lu mahapkan la kan dia hehee sbb gua suka gak tgk bola..tapi gua layan world cup je hehee
fuh kewl giler entry nih!
zara, actually I needed to update my blog sebab nak cover previous blog entry :P So yeah, I suppose the only accomplishment for watper-beb guy is that he merited his own entry on my blog! hahah.
neomesuff, mamat ni ala2 sober kekononnya. imagine if he's drunk. terus dia ajak i merempit agaknya.
Your previous posting has caused your street cred to drop meh?
Aku le salah sorang dari bini-bini orang yang kena pakai football jersey tu... hihihi. Tapi aku tak tengok bola, aku tengok Akademi Fantasia je... (sure kena kutuk gak lepas nih... hihihi).
hahaha!
SD, drop giler gua punya street cred :P
dayang, pakai jersey bola takpe, as long as you are genuinely interested. tengok AF pun takpe, as long as you don't become president fan club for budak2 yang kalah AF. dahla by virtue of joining AF they're losers in the first place.. so kira kau jadi president of losers among losers club ler... Oh, aku sangat bitter.
AM, hee hee....
hidup lagi ye akademi fantasia? hmm.. ni kena usha kat youtube ni..
Jatuh street cred? Cipan betul. Lain kali lu pegang lagi wa punya tangan kat Carrefour wa kenen sama lu, "Lu watper beb?" Dah lah beli beras 10kg suruh wa angkat bakul aje dengan beras kat dalam bakul sebab lu nak pegang tangan. Konon tolak cart tak leh pegang tangan. :p
Boleh?
Maybe your next entry can be "Ini blog MAKAN"? Hehe.
beb,'ngok ngek ngok ngek' tu bunyi apa beb...??
tertanya2 wa beb...
SD, bila masa gua pegi Carrefour dengan lu?
Nor, watch out for my next entry...
Kmr, ngok ngek ngok ngek tu bunyi orang tua membebel... Don't get any weird ideas, k!
Lu buat-buat lupa nanti wa lupa betul...
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